WTF is this!?

This week, the House Jan 6th  Committee had an “emergency hearing “with some earth shattering news. A lady named Cassidy Hutchinson who was an assistant to former Chief of Staff Mark Meadows testified that a Secret Service Agent told here that another Secret Service agent was driving “The Beast” which is civilian slang for the presidential stretch limo and President Trump was so upset that he couldn’t go to the Capitol Building that he lunged after the Secret Service and grabbed the steering wheel!

The problem was that: The US Secret Service never calls the presidential stretch limo, the Beast! It’s simply called the Limo. The President was in an SUV, nicknamed the Camp David Car or Camp car. Problem number three was that President Trump is 6’3 over 250 lbs and over 70 years old, probably wearing a suitcoat as well as an overcoat. Not exactly Ninja material. The forth issue is that there is no record of this incident. Now Secret Service personnel are to keep their mouths shut. But; something like this the Special Agent would tell somebody. The other guys at work, a wife, or girlfriend, the bartender or minister. “Man; you ain’t gonna believe this shit! I’m driving the SUV and I have to return to the White House and President Trump said “I’m the fucking president, I’m going to the Capitol!” Now I tell him for safety concerns we have to go back to the White House. Then the President of the United States gets up from the back and grabs my neck from behind then grabs the fucking steering wheel!” Anything remotely true would have been broadcasted like it was 9/11!

Now; for Obama’s Vice President, stories have been flying about Joe Biden skinny dipping at the Executive Mansion pool and at his palatial beach house in Delaware in front of male and female Secret Service Agents and US Navy Stewards! Allegedly when Biden dies this the call sign “COBRA” is mentioned on the Motorola radios! Also we have allegations that the VP got fresh to a young lady that was the wife or girlfriend of one of the Agents on his detail. And we have a victim of Joe Biden’s sexual harassment!

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