Happy Days are here again?

Actor/director Ron Howard decided to have some sort of Happy Days virtual reunion with former cast members including Henry Winkler, Donnie Most, Anson Williams, and Marion Ross. The purpose of this is to raise money for the Wisconsin Democratic Party. One cast member who will not appear is Scott Baio, a vocal supporter of Donald Trump. I follow Baio on Twitter. Here is my idea of how the Happy Days characters would be holding up after the 1960’s counterculture revolution.

Howard and Marion Cunningham: Howard’s hardware store was looted and burned in the Milwaukee race riot of 1967. Howard took the insurance money and retired. Cunningham Hardware is now a Goodwill. Howard died in 1980. Marion died in a abusive nursing home in 1989.

Richie and Lori Beth Cunningham: Moved to California to be the big screen writer. Richie ended up writing scripts in the booming adult film industry and for local television commercials. The Cunningham’s became swingers and ended up divorced. Richie Jr is a recovering addict.

Arthur Fonzarelli “The Fonz”: Sold his share of Arnold’s and Bonko’s Garage, concentrating on teaching shop at Jefferson High School. Fonize is accused of numerous inappropriate relationships with females. Fortunately the Milwaukee Teachers Union saved Fonzie’s job and he ended up pushing paperwork for the school bus fleet until retirement.

Potsie Weber: Became a social worker. Also comes out of the closet. Milwaukee is not not tolerant of the LGBT community, so Potsie moves to San Francisco where he contracts a strange disease affecting primarily gay men.

Ralph Malph: Became an optometrist. Unfortunately some of his patients eyesight became more impaired as he issued glasses with the wrong prescription. He had no malpractice insurance as it was not even available at the time, so he lost everything and was a manager of comedy clubs until he died in 1999.

Jennie Piccolo: Became a feminist in the Women’s movement in the 1970’s. She also decided to become a lesbian. She became a teacher of Women’s Studies at UCLA.

Chachi and Joanie Arcola: After a failed music career, Joanie and Chachi move back to Milwaukee. Chachi joins the Milwaukee Fire Department. Joanie becomes a Catholic school teacher. Chachi rises to the rank of Lieutenant, but is constantly passed over for Captain thanks to Affirmative Action. The Arcola’s had 4 kids.